Dear Deacon
by StinsBatskylovin
Summary: In the present day Rayna reads a letter she wrote but never sent to Deacon 15 years ago. It's a letter that explains everything and it's based on the last couple of episodes where we learn that Rayna's oldest daughter is actually Deacon's daughter.
1. Dear Deacon

**This story is about a lost letter that was never sent to Deacon and it's set in the present day. It's after last weeks episode and it's a great way of looking at what would've been if Deacon and Rayna stayed together and her feelings for him even now 15 year later after writing this letter. Enjoy!**

***Dear Deacon***

_I am writing this letter to tell you something that I've been keeping from you for a while. But, first I wanted to ask how your doing in rehab. Is everything fine? Are you liking it? Have you made any friends? How are you sleeping, are you sleeping well at night and getting the rest you need? I hope so because I only want to be sure you're okay cause that's all I want for you right now. _

_Anyway, I am writing to tell you something that's been eating away at me since I saw you the last time I saw you... Uh, promise me that you won't get mad at me and start to relapse cause if you do then your life would be in my hands and I wouldn't want that for neither of us. Before I continue, I wanted to tell you that I love you, I still love you and no matter what happens in our lives I just wanted to let you know that I do love you and always have even after all this time not together. So, here's why I'm writing this letter to you..._

_I'm pregnant, I'm pregnant and it's your baby._

The letter is in her hand, she had been cleaning the house on this day because she was bored and alone in the house by herself. So, when she came upon a letter that she wrote 15 year ago everything that she remembered came back to her. The last time Deacon and her saw each other before he went to rehab, the fight they had over his drug problem, the wild and crazy nights going out to every bar in town, coming home and have wild and passionate sex, holding him in her arms for the last time before he left for rehab, kissing him goodbye after dropping him off in front of the rehab doors. And, most importantly, the night Deacon had proposed. That night was the most wonderful and romantic night of her life, they had gone out to their favorite restaurant, had their favorite bottle of wine (which they both loved), the music playing (it was a life violinist) playing for each table with couples. Then, dessert came and the ring was in Rayna's chocolate cake but she didn't know it until she accidentally ate a piece of the cake. But, she spit it out wondering what was in her dessert and then looked down and saw the most beautiful ring she's ever seen staring at her. Deacon to the ring, wiped it off on a napkin and stood up before her and went over and got down on one knee.

Of course Rayna said yes but that engagement was short lived since he soon after went to rehab and they grew apart. But, Rayna remembers it all. She looks down at the letter she never sent to Deacon in her hand and the tears started to fall. She remembers writing that letter all those years ago and never having the courage to actually send it to him. But, she remembers and still regrets never sending it cause she always thought what if? And all the answers came back to their last fight before he went to rehab. Rayna lifted the letter in her hand and wiped her tear stained face. She wanted to open the letter but decided against that cause in her heart she always still wants to give this letter to Deacon. The courage to do so thought isn't there but she still wants to know what he would've said if she just sent that letter to him 15 years ago.

Rayna dried her tears got up from the bed, took the letter that she will never give to Deacon and put it back inside the box it was in. That box had been hidden very carefully in a space where her family wouldn't find it. It was in her favorite place in her house and since it's been there nobody has found it which to her was relief that her family still doesn't know about this letter.

It was getting late now, her family would start to come home soon so she finished up her cleaning made sure everything was perfect and in place again before going to take a shower.

The letter though, that letter will never be sent to Deacon. And, maybe in some other time she'll have the courage to give it to him but for now it's safe inside that brown box upstairs hidden back in the place she hoped nobody will look.

5pm arrived and her family started to bust in the door yelling. Rayna sighed and smiled heading down stairs to welcome her family home.

**I want to thank anyone who reads this and hope to see some comments cause I love reading what you all have to say on my fics.**


	2. Just Helping (my daughter)

Chapter based on Ep115 "When You're Tired Of Breaking Other Hearts"

=X=X=

Rayna woke up to the sound of her daughters voice. Maddie has been anxious about going to see Juliet Barns in her first performance as her own manager. Juliet had put out an instant message to all her supporters about having a performance at noon and so Maddie talked about it with her friends first but wanted to ask her mom if she could go. Sometimes teenager or even any young kid can have a rebellion phase but ever since Maddie found out about her parents divorce she's been really rude to Rayna which makes her worry that something might happen to her and that scares the life out of her.

Now, don't get Rayna wrong she was once a rebel herself at her daughters age but that wasn't along rebelling phase like some teens or pre-teens get. Rayna never did anything too terrible but once after her mothers death she went out with her friends, cutting school, drinking, trying her first cigarette and doing a hit of Pot because she was lost and mourning her mothers death. At a young age kids either have an innocence about them or they start doing things like cutting classes or joining some bad kids that aren't good for you and would lead you to do other bad things.

With her kids, Rayna always tried her best to keep them on the straight and narrow ways of life because she was too scared that something awful would happen to them. But, her children aren't like some kids in today's society in fact they are angels trying to better themselves by trying their hands at music. They have written some songs but are not sure they want to make them known to the public yet. Maddie has always admired her mothers career because she finds her mother to be something special when she sings because she thinks her mother is really talented especially when she's singing with Uncle Deacon.

Deacon has always been a big part of Rayna's life but her children don't know anything more about the past they shared at one time. Rayna has wondered and worried about Deacon finding out that Maddie's his daughter and even more scared of what her daughter would say if this came out without telling her, herself and after Maddie asked her mother if she could go to Juliet's concert and said no because it's not the best environment for her to go. Maddie wasn't happy about Rayna saying no to a concert that couldn't be anything more than just a fun time with her friends plus Deacon's going to be their playing for her. But, all that Maddie hears is that NO word and it makes her angry at her mother forbidding her to go to see Juliet and Uncle Deacon perform so she starts to ignore and be really rude to Rayna right to her face. This is why she worries that her children if Rayna asks them to do something they would do something like what Maddie is doing right now. Ignoring her because she hates that she can't go to one concert in the middle of the day with a few friends.

Rayna grounded Maddie for a week by taking away her computer, phone and her TV privileges. With nothing to do she talks to the only father she's ever known Teddy who she always goes to when she's mad at her mom. Teddy of course said it was okay to hang out with some of her friends after school the following Monday without Rayna's knowledge of this Teddy secretly told his daughter to be home before her mother was. But, when Maddie wounded up breaking the rule her father gave her to be home's before her mother gets home was missed and she lost track of the time since she didn't have her cell phone with her to check the time.

It was well passed her curfew when Teddy started to get worried so he sent some of his men who work for him at the Governor's office to find her. But, before that happened he got a phone call from the hospital telling him that his daughter had been hurt while at Juliet's show. When he showed up at the hospital, Deacon was there with Rayna and they were talking about what happened with Maddie at Juliet's show.

"So, what happened?" Teddy asked Rayna who had just pulled away from Deacon's embrace, they had been hugging for 2 minutes before Teddy showed up he rolled his eyes and cleared his throat before asking what happened.

"Maddie went to Juliet's sudden show, she was in the audience dancing along to the music when I spotted her. I was on stage when I saw her, I wondered what she's doing at the show at first but then when she collapsed I stopped the show and brought her here." Deacon explained hoping he wouldn't start a fight with Teddy over this if he put the blame on him.

"Can I see her?" Teddy asks but Rayna tells him that she's still in the ER getting checked over they should know something soon.

As they waited Rayna pulled Deacon over to the side to talk to him and thank him for protecting Maddie and bringing him here to the hospital before any further damage was done.

"Thank you Deacon, if you weren't there then I don't know what would've happened." She started to tear up a little more and Deacon again pulled her in for a hug.

"It's no problem I was concerned that Maddie was at the show without your permission or Teddy's so when I saw her collapse and almost got trampled on I stopped the show and ran to help her." Deacon knew that Rayna and Maddie has had some problems lately concerning Rayna's divorce so seeing Maddie at the show today was shocking cause he also knows that Rayna's been going through a lot and the last thing he wants is for Rayna to be hurting over possibly almost losing her daughter over something that's between her and Teddy. Deacon knows it's personal for Rayna and for Teddy and tried to stay away as best as he could while she's going through this divorce.

"I'm grateful you were there and if you weren't I don't know what would've happened especially since there were other people hurt at that show." Rayna didn't want to put any blame on Deacon because it wasn't his fault.

"It's all my fault, if I just let her go to the show this would've never happened." Deacon shock his head and pulled her into his embrace again because Rayna isn't to blame. Maddie was just upset that she couldn't go to the show but Rayna blaming this on herself is not okay.

"No, Rayna this isn't your fault it was Maddie doing some rebelling over her being mad at you and Teddy getting divorce. So, she sneaked out without your permission it's what all girls her age do. You even did that when you were young too." It saddens Deacon that Rayna's blaming herself when this is not her fault, it's nobody's fault. Maddie's parents are divorcing, it's hard on a young kid to see that their once happy parents are splitting up. It's the most crushing heartbreaking thing any kids can go through having Rayna say all this breaks his heart a little more.

"You're right, but what am I going to do with her? She's been acting up ever since she found out about my divorce. I'm worried that she's going to keep rebelling against me to spite me and that's the thing that worries me the most." Rayna broke the hold on Deacon and is now face to face with him.

"You just have to talk to her and set things right. She's a lost and confused young girl who's taking her parents divorce hard. Be easy going with her and let her see your point of view." Rayna had forgotten how smart Deacon is and how right he is.

"Okay, I'll try and talk to her." Rayna says smiling and kissing Deacon on the cheek.

"Great, let me know what happens ok?" Deacon smiled back and in that moment he realizes that holding Rayna in his arms again the way they just did made him fall in love with her all over again.

"I will, and thanks again for saving Maddie I will forever be thankful to you for that." Rayna smiled once more before walking away back to see if she could see her daughter and Deacon watched as she left smiling glad to see Rayna smiling again.

"You're very welcome I would do it again just to see you smile." Deacon says to himself watching Rayna walk to see her daughter.


End file.
